Communication is often a topic of discussion, as it is a major factor in all relationships. When effective communication is used, relationships at work, home, and personal life can improve. The connection that a person has to other people deepens through the use of healthy communication skills, and even difficult messages can be conveyed without creating conflict or decreasing trust. Clear communication helps to avoid misunderstandings that can result in anger, frustration, hurt, or confusion. A number of skills make up effective communication, including the following:
Nonverbal communication – a lot can be said without actually speaking – tone of voice, facial expressions, body posture, body movements, and eye contact can all convey messages. If our words do not fit with our actions, then confusion can result. Making sure that body language matches your words can decrease and improve understanding.
Attentive listening – one of the most important aspects of effective communication is listening. This means not only understanding the words being spoken but also the feelings behind what is being said. The speaker should feel heard, understood, and safe to express any feelings that are being experienced.
Managing stress – stress can get in the way of effective communication by decreasing a person’s ability to think clearly and act appropriately. Other things can occur under stress, such as misreading others’ actions or words, sending confusing nonverbal signals, demonstrating reactive types of behaviors, or shutting down. Reducing your stress level will help to avoid these encounters and allow you to communicate in a more healthy manner.
Recognizing and understanding emotions – when a person is out of touch with their feelings, it is difficult to understand what is being felt and why, and therefore communicating these feelings to others becomes especially difficult. When feelings are understood, then disagreements about things that are not really the issue can result. For example, if you can understand what your feelings are about a certain situation (ie. anger, frustration, or hurt), you will be less likely to argue about whose turn it is to do a certain task.
Assertiveness – this is a form of mutual respect for self and others. Assertiveness is a core communication skill, and is defined by the expression of emotions and points of view while being respectful of the rights and beliefs of others. Saying how you feel but still understanding that the other person may not agree, makes it more likely that conflict can be resolved in a positive way.